Saw that little happy face on my ovulation test. This means that there is a increase in luteinising hormone, which typically happens 1-2 days before ovulation. So with the help of Clomid I should produce a healthy eggs or two within the next couple of days. Giving me the best chances to conceive within the next 12-36 hours. We have been having sex every other day since 4/14/14, any more then that causes a major decreases healthy sperm. But this is the one time in the month we can have sex two days in a row. (Nothing is sexier they scheduling)
I feel good about this month, but part of me is a little afraid that I am setting myself up to be disappointed. I couldn't sleep last night so I laid in bed thinking about how great it would be to announce our pregnancy to our families. Calling my sisters, first tweeting Nicole to make sure she answers her phone, I'd love to do something kitchy to tell mom. Like get her a onesie that says grandma or something like that. I laid there for like 4 hours thinking about how amazing the feeling would be to see that positive on a pregnancy test and the excitement i would feel telling everyone. I can't really help it, I know its not healthy for me to submerge myself in thoughts that could potentially cause me pain, but that's the problem. I want this so bad I can't help but fantasize about it.
Well I might as well hold onto the good feels while I can. If this isn't our month then I have to start over again. I've been incorporating a daily devotional into my routine in the mornings outside, the weather has been so beautiful lately that it helps me feel closer to God. its a different experience when you are praying and there is a nice breeze blowing through your hair. I read the bible for a bit, then I pray. Sometimes I don't know what to say so when I do I write it down, like a note. And then when I am at a loss for words I will go back and read what I have said before and it usually it will get me in the mood to talk to God. During prayer I will put my christian music on shuffle on my iPod and sometimes a random song comes on and it really speaks to my mood.
- Ovulation all I ever wanted